When in doubt, look for a sign

Even before I had any inkling of personal beliefs, I was the kind of person who would look for a sign. Whether to confirm something I’m questioning or a sign for something that was beyond my realm of thought. I believe in the power of coincidence and reassurance regardless of any idealogical narrative behind them. 

Today, I woke up from a dream that did quite well in trying to convince me to do something in aversion to a goal I set. I began to do that very thing and I could feel conflict, should I do it or not? So, I backed away and decided I will look for a sign to do it. 

A sign does not need to imply a sign from some sort of God or divinity. A sign can simply be a coincidence of circumstances that just happened to have lined up. 

It’s placing the intention of using that to benefit decision making that makes it special. 

Almost immediately, I get a sign that my dream was in fact, calling a weaker part of myself to hide in the same habitual hole I often returned to. And I feel better for resisting that urge, knowing I must change that habit to be better. 

I write all of this because it is not only okay, but inevitable, to be unsure of your decision making when you are attempting to do something mindfully. Second guesses can be mindfulness and gut instincts can be habitual conditioning.

 The “follow your gut” spiel is good for trying to find your path in a general sense, but to stay on that path with every step, well, you want to be able to use discernment as the mind can be tricky. 

Look for clarification and signs for what you need. Listen to words people say carefully. Sit with the decision in meditation. See what happens effortlessly and then notice resistance. 

I remember a friend of mine told me a story where he had gotten his life together as he found sobriety after years of addiction, and he wanted to go to school for something that helped people. But, he didn’t know what. So he asked for a sign and within a minute, while driving in his car, he sat in traffic behind a license plate that said, “Be a Nurse”… and so he did it. Sometimes, it will be that easy. 

While uploading my first episodes of my podcast to Spotify, I saw I could upload it as a video which I did not realize I could do on that platform. I felt conflicted as I did have the video for it, but I had already planned YouTube being video format and Spotify being audio. I tried to upload the video FIVE TIMES - each time causing the website to glitch anytime I attempted to edit the description. I took that as a sign to just upload it as audio, like originally planned, and it uploaded first try in less than 5 minutes. 

If you feel doubt about something, though it is so easy to tell yourself it is silly or juvenile, perhaps look for a sign. Sometimes all you need is a little reassurance. 

• Dani 💚💙