Transmuting Heartaches

 Heartbreak has been a huge catalyst for personal development in my life. Whether it’s romantic heartbreak, losing a loved one, a monumentally devastating event, witnessing everyday sorrows, any of it, it can encourage incredible growth. 

The ache of a broken heart is inevitable in one capacity or another, yet so many people don’t know what to do with it. Some sit in the pain with sitcoms and ice cream. Others dive into work or creative pursuits. Some jump into the arms of a lover or the bottom of a liquor bottle. With endless coping options, it’s hard to say which is best, but I would guess that whatever helps you become a better you would be a good choice. 

It’s wild to insist that one must use their heartbreak for productivity, and I hope it does not appear I am doing that. Rather, the heartache is happening whether you like it or not, wouldn’t it be nice to know while it persists there is also an ounce of good from it? 

I had heartbreak that caused me to spiral into self-destructive habits like drinking and using drugs. Everyday it got darker and worse. The way I was coping wasn’t providing any hope or healing. But, through the turmoil of a night where I truly and deeply contemplated ending my life, circumstances had it where I didn’t. And shortly after I found the path of spiritual unfoldment and enlightenment which saved my life. It granted me perspective and wonder that showed me out of my despair. Had I not went through that, who knows the kind of person I would be today?  

Finding my partner who I would have my son with only happened because heartache led me to move to Florida. And even this blog is product of extreme love for my son and heartache of certain circumstances.

When my heart hurts and I so badly want to cry over things out of my control, I usually feel it, sit with it, have a cry, and lately, I’ve been bringing myself out of it to post or write on one of these platforms. 

It’s been extremely cathartic as I have an outlet for my thoughts and feelings that also provides a path out of the circumstances that cause the ache in the first place. Not to mention, due to the sheer amount of posting I am doing, I am gaining supporters who have been showing me nothing but love. 

I do not want to condone or encourage running away from the pain into productivity. As I mentioned, I sit with it and I feel it. I cry, I talk/write about it, and I allow myself to acknowledge the anguish. Only then, I decide to transmute it into creative expression towards my goals. 

With Realistic Intentionality being about putting intention in every moment and everything, being able to put intention to feel and transmute even the most overwhelming of emotions is definitely worthy of some thought. 

• Dani 💚💙